Thread Title Search. Member Since: It’s no fucking fun.. You can’t fix crazy sooner or later you start to become as crazy as her. Use her for sex and move on. You will probably end up getting with her thinking you will change her but you won’t.
I’ve been seeing this girl for the past 4 months, and she is great, she’s smart, she’s beautiful, we have lots in common, and I haven’t felt so naturally drawn to one woman in my 21 years of life. Basically, it’s a personality disorder that at times makes her highly impulsive, overly clingy and sometimes very angry for no particular reason. She is on a lot of medication for it, and most of the time is fine, but she has her moments where she just loses it.
She also has a history of self-harm and used to cut herself, but doesn’t anymore. She told me it all stems from when she was until she was diagnosed at 16, her Mother used to force her into Beauty Pageants, and she told me that her Mother would often force her to stay in her room for the 24 hours- sometimes more leading up the pageant, so she wouldn’t eat any junk food without her Mother knowing and “Get fat”. Which caused her to become paranoid about her self-image and became a bulimic from the age of 13 until she was She is still far too self-conscious, but is no longer a bulimic.
Anyway, even though she lives at home, she has still been staying over at my place a lot, the past month. To the point where she is practically living with me. She doesn’t work, but neither do I. Her rage is probably the biggest issue though. Just yesterday, we were putting away the dishes, and I put a fork, where the spoons should have been, and she just flipped out.
It was like all her inner rage was coming out, she was pretty vicious verbally and wouldn’t listen to reason, and even threw a plate at me which I managed to duck out of the way of luckily. She sort of immediatly realised what she did and started crying and apologising and threw herself at me, so I just held her for what was seriously like 30 minutes. The anger though was completely unexpected and pretty scary, and got me thinking, you know?
I really do like her a lot, more than any other woman I have been in a relationship with, because her REAL personality- when not having an outburst or going through a mood is amazing, and I have to say the sex is the best I have ever had, because she uses it as a way to release pent-up anger which is pretty wild. But I am not sure if I am ready to be in a relationship with a chick with so much baggage.
What would you all do in my situation? And Have any of you been in a relationship with someone with BPD or other mental disorders, and if so, how did you handle it? Meds try to counter it. Last edited by MichaelScarn; at THey also tend to mirror you, so i would question if the good side of her, is actually her real personality as well. First, read this thread: A lot of you know myself and WVUskinsfan Next, you need to seriously sit down and think about whether you are willing to put yourself through this or if you need to cut ties right now.
And cut ties means cut ties. No contact whatsover. No matter the tantrums or threats to you or to herself. Last edited by Cry Me A River; at Stick around if you’re happy with living a rollercoaster walk-on-eggshells life full of maddening lows, or if you can’t conceivably find anyone else. It doesn’t seem impossible that she could kill you, which means if you respect yourself, leave. For you, learning not to take the verbal abuse personally is key.
Don’t fuel the fire by responding in a negative way. Take the blame. Tell her she is right but you can’t make her feel like you are placating her. Be sincere but non combative. If you plan on being with her then therapy And a good thetapist is a must. Good luck. Leave now. You only know the tip of the iceberg of what you’re in for if you stay with this. Get out. My mother is BPD.
It’s a nightmare. Seems like this crazy gf motif comes up a lot. It’s so obvious that she’s gonna cause you all kinds of trouble, and only you know if you think her up side is worth it to you. Your main mistake is thinking that the anger isnt part of her personality, it is , and you will have to deal with it at some point much more often than you would expect. Dating someone with that kind of issue is pretty similar to playing poker , you think you can handle running bad because you never ran bad enough to understand it, but at some point maybe she ll get worse or you wont be strong enough to deal with it.
You know the answer to your question but can you accept that answer. So wait, she is clinky, has mother issues, self image issues, and gets emotional for no apparent reason? Sounds like most women. Deal with it. These girls are taught from day 1 of their life that they are daddy’s perfect little princess, surroundings themselves with do-boys and alpha bitches. Welcome to earth. Ah, dear, I feel for you.
It’s a tough road to follow. Incredible highs. Depressing lows. The short answer to your problem is, as a poster above put it, therapy. If she’s presently in therapy, you have a chance at a successful, long term relationship. If not in therapy, walk away. And this will be a tough thing to do, because of her clingy-ness. One of the most difficult and frustrating and self-perpetuating things about dealing with a borderline is their difficulty, and sometimes total inability to trust.
Which is why she needs therapy. To give an example: She says, “Do you think I’m pretty? It’s not your fault. It’s her inability to trust you, or anyone at this point. She was conditioned this way. She cannot trust those closest to her, because, look at her track record. I repeat: Through a good therapist, she can learn to trust herself and her choices, because, right now, that little voice in her head is not very trustworthy.
Medication alone cannot ‘fix’ this. If she learns to trust her therapist, and then herself, there’s a good chance you can have a successful relationship with her. Other comorbid issues such as depression or anxiety can be managed by medication, but any underlying personality disorder requires fairly intensive therapy to make any changes.
So is she in therapy? If not, you need to understand this will not get better. You cannot fix this or her. These are long entrenched patterns of thinking and behaving and even if she recognizes in other moments that she doesn’t want to act that way, nothing will change without some sort of treatment. Neither does she. She won’t just be exactly like she is minus the crazy. That’s not the way it works. Only you can determine if being with someone who has significant personality problems is something you are willing to do.
I think most people would prefer something easier, because being with her would take a tremendous amount of work and patience. If that’s something you are willing to do then best of luck, but I might suggest you have people you can talk to as your own support system as well. Short version: My ex-wife has BPD. Longer version: She threw a remote at me and hit me in the head just after we got engaged because an old girlfriend said Hi to me.
She shattered a drinking glass on my shoulder. She cut my head open with a coffee mug I later passed out from loss of blood. She cut my eye with her engagement ring when she hit me while we were on our way to couples therapy. She hit me over the head with a wooden table leg. She cheated on me multiple times with multiple guys. She disappeared with my son for 6 weeks when he was 3 because she was mad at me.
She alienated all of our friends, including two separate churches we attended. She cut herself throughout our time together 13 years and continually threatened suicide. She threatened to leave every few months because I “wasn’t doing enough” even though I worked full-time and took care of the kids and house when I got home. She eventually left and took the kids. She’s an expert manipulator and liar and was able to convince the courts to give her custody.
Dating someone with BPD (borderline personality disorder). * long post, cliff notes at bottom. Roughly three or four weeks ago I ended a year. Old , AM. MichaelScarn. grinder. Join Date: May Posts: Dating Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder.
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I’ve been seeing this girl for the past 4 months, and she is great, she’s smart, she’s beautiful, we have lots in common, and I haven’t felt so naturally drawn to one woman in my 21 years of life. Basically, it’s a personality disorder that at times makes her highly impulsive, overly clingy and sometimes very angry for no particular reason.
Need Help? United States. Results 1 to 4 of 4. Dating someone with BPD borderline personality disorder. For those of you who don’t know about BPD, it stands for borderline personality disorder, and is a mental and neurological disorder with some or all of the following traits: Well, for starters, beneath her issues she is a bright and beautiful person with many good qualities.
Aftermath of dating someone with BPD. I dated a woman for about 2 years off and on.. She has been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. She was molested at a young age. I have been through more in this relationship than all relationships combined. There were suicide threats frequently, she cut herself at the beginning of the relationship, she actually did hit me once, the cops were called on us because she wouldn’t stop screaming at my apartment, she went really psycho when she would drink, extreme jealousy, lying, and she constantly said she was scared I would abandon her. The good parts of the relationship though keep coming back in my mind. My ex was incredibly attractive.
Borderline personality traits can cause serious relationship difficulties, and my site currently houses 23 articles on this topic. These letters were originally posted as is, including typo’s to my advice Forum , and I hope they’ll be helpful to you.
I hope to read a lot more and contribute when I get some time. I’ve had a glance around and it looks like there’s a lot of support and great advice here.
Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate. Did it get better or worse? TDH49 Joined: It only gets better when you leave! I suppose if the Meds work AND they stay on them they could be tolerable IgorFrankensteen Joined: Borderline personality is a “label diagnosis” problem, like bipolar disease, or sexual addition, or any number of things. That means that doctors can NOT do a biological test and confirm it, and that no one can predict how it will progress, or even if it will. Someone can be labeled “borderline personality” today, by one set of psychs, and be labeled “bipolar” by the next, and labeled something else by another.
Вернитесь назад, – приказала Сьюзан. – Документ слишком объемный. Найдите содержание. Соши открутила несколько страниц. Механизм атомной бомбы A) альтиметр B) детонатор сжатого воздуха C) детонирующие головки D) взрывчатые заряды E) нейтронный дефлектор F) уран и плутоний G) свинцовая защита Н) взрыватели II. Ядерное делениеядерный синтез A) деление (атомная бомба) и синтез (водородная бомба) B) U-235, U-238 и плутоний III.
История атомного оружия A) разработка (Манхэттенский проект) B) взрыв 1) Хиросима 2) Нагасаки 3) побочные продукты атомного взрыва 4) зоны поражения – Раздел второй! – сразу же воскликнула Сьюзан.
Ключ… – Ее передернуло. – Коммандер Стратмор отправил кого-то в Испанию с заданием найти ключ. – И что? – воскликнул Джабба. – Человек Стратмора его нашел. Сьюзан, больше не в силах сдержать слезы, разрыдалась.
Агенты связались с ним, когда он находился в Южной Америке, и сообщили, что операция прошла неудачно, поэтому Фонтейн в общих чертах уже знал, что случилось. Тут вступил агент Колиандер: – Как вы приказали, мы повсюду следовали за Халохотом. В морг он не пошел, поскольку в этот момент напал на след еще какого-то парня в пиджаке и галстуке, вроде бы штатского. – Штатского? – переспросил Фонтейн. Скорее всего это игры Стратмора: он мудро решил не впутывать в это дело агентство. – Фильтры Протокола передачи файлов выходят из строя! – крикнул кто-то из технического персонала.
– Нам нужен этот предмет, – сказал Фонтейн. – Где сейчас находится Халохот.
Ответ был очень простым: есть люди, которым не принято отвечать. – Мистер Беккер, – возвестил громкоговоритель. – Мы прибываем через полчаса. Беккер мрачно кивнул невидимому голосу. Замечательно. Он опустил шторку иллюминатора и попытался вздремнуть.
Она ткнула его в ногу носком туфли. – Я сказала нет! – И, выдержав паузу, добавила: – И до вчерашней ночи это была правда. В глазах Сьюзан Дэвид был самим совершенством – насколько вообще такое. Одно только ее беспокоило: всякий раз, когда они куда-то ходили, он решительно противился тому, чтобы она сама платила за. Сьюзан не могла с этим смириться, видя, как он выкладывает за их обед свою дневную заработную плату, но спорить с ним было бесполезно.
Она в конце концов перестала протестовать, но это продолжало ее беспокоить. Я зарабатываю гораздо больше, чем в состоянии потратить, – думала она, – поэтому будет вполне естественным, если я буду платить.
Dealing w/ Borderline Personality Disorder In Our Relationship – Q & A